Limericks

A limerick is a humorous poem consisting of five lines. The first, second, and fifth lines must have seven to ten syllables while rhyming and having the same verbal rhythm. The third and fourth lines only have to have five to seven syllables, and have to rhyme with each other and have the same rhythm.

1. 7-10 syllables, A rhyme

2. 7-10 syllables, A rhyme

3. 5-7 syllables, B rhyme

4. 5-7 syllables, B rhyme

5. 7-10 syllables, A rhyme

There was an Old Man with a beard

Who said, “It is just as I feared!

Two Owls and a Hen,

Four Larks and a Wren

Have all built their nests in my beard!”

Hickory, dickory, dock,

The mouse ran up the clock,

The clock struck one,

And down he run,

Hickory, dickory, dock.

There was an old man from Peru,

Who dreamt he was eating his shoe,

He awoke in a fright

In the middle of the night

And found it was perfectly true.

Said an ape as he swung by his tail,

To his offspring both female and male;

“From your offspring, my dears,

In a couple of years,

May evolve a professor at Yale.”

Lady Gaga, she can’t do wrong,

Looking great wearing slacks as in things,

After every new bender,

She changes her gender,

But at least she still writes her own songs.

A macho young swimmer named Dwyer,

Really liked playing with fire,

One night in the dark

He swam with a shark,

And his voice is now two octaves higher.

A bather whose clothing was strewed

By winds was left quite in the nude,

Saw a man come along,

And unless we are wrong,

You expected this line to be lewd.

Two brothers named Wong couldn’t quite

Pull off their first airplane flight,

When their rig crashed and burned

They finally learned

Two Wongs could never make a Wright.

There was a young fellow of Crete

Who was so exceedingly neat,

When he got out of bed,

He stood on his head

To make sure of not soiling his feet.

A pompous conductor named Clyde

Was worshipped by fans far and wide.

But his beat was unclear,

And he had a bad ear,

So the orchestra cheered when he died.